


I See the Light

by black_tea_blue_pens



Series: Disney princes(ses) [2]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Anxiety, Heavy Angst, M/M, Physical Pain, Secondary Otayuri, Secondary Phichris, The Little Mermaid AU, fairytale AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-21
Updated: 2019-10-21
Packaged: 2020-12-26 23:44:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21109148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/black_tea_blue_pens/pseuds/black_tea_blue_pens
Summary: Victor is the Crown Prince of the abyss merfolk. He is loved and trusted by his people, but overwhelmed by responsibilities. In order to escape from his work and obligations, he makes trips searching for something else, and eventually he finds the light. And with the light he discovers colors, the surface and a young boy who likes to dance at the beach





	I See the Light

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Bectara](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bectara/gifts).

> This is a list of all the Japanese terms appearing on the fic:  
DANGO: Japanese sweet  
HAORI: Japanese traditional jacket.  
KANZASHI: hair holder, generally in the shape of a stick.  
ONSEN: public baths  
RYOKAN: traditional inn  
SHAMISEN: Japanese string instrument  
YOKAI: fantastic creatures from the Japanese folklore
> 
> SECONDARY SHIPS RELATED SPOILER ALERT  
I thought I would say this just in case. Chris and Phichit don't end up together in this fanfic.
> 
> Without further ado, please enjoy the reading.

The very first memory Victor had of the Surface was a ray of sunshine. He was only ten, a curious child, always in search of new wonders and treasures. He had gotten lost, and he had wandered around looking for his tutor, his father, or anyone he knew.

At some point he lost his sense of direction, and he swam up and up, far beyond where he should, and his head started aching from the decrease in pressure but he kept going, too scared to think straight, too nervous to keep track of time. And then he saw it. The slightest gleam of light, filtering through the water, trying to get a little further, to reach into the depths of the sea.

It was not his sonar that was detecting this and Victor didn’t know what it was. He had never _ seen _anything before. It was beautiful, more than anything he had ever experienced before, but it was new, and also scary.

He turned around and swam as far away from it as he could, fearful of the unknown.

* * *

As the years passed Victor grew up but he never forgot that feeling. Abyss merfolk were simple people who stayed where they were born and traditionally had no curiosity for what was beyond their underwater villages. Whenever someone tried to travel, they never came back. And it was not Victor’s place to break that tradition, for he was King-To-Be. So he kept the memory of the sunshine in his heart and buried every urge he had to see it again.

By the age of twenty two, he had become the prince his people needed him to be. He was dedicated, smart, and had learnt from his father the right way to tackle problems, without being restricted by traditions and what was considered the normal way of doing things. As the king grew older, no one worried about the kingdom’s future. His capabilities made him renowned, and so it came to a point where the people would request an audience with the Prince rather than the King, and Victor complied. Most days, he would spend hours and hours locked in the palace, working to achieve the wellbeing of the people, to come up with new, long-lasting, effective solutions to old problems that his predecessors hadn’t managed the right way, and to solve the new issues that kept appearing and needing to be addressed. On occasion, he would take long walks through the village and the kingdom, trying to keep in contact with his people and reach for them so he didn’t lose the grasp on reality as kings and leaders often did. Some days he took his best friend with him, so he would help him with his cheery calm and relaxed demeanor, and that made the day easier. Both of them were easy-going and it was not hard to win over people’s trust.

And that was Victor’s life, day after day after day.

At some point it became too much. It built up little by little, just like a rock buried by the sand in the seabed. Some days, Victor would be too tense, some others he would be just fine. Sometimes he found himself crying for the silliest of reasons, and everything seemed to overwhelm him, but he would be fine the next day so he ignored it and pushed forward.

“Chris.” They were both returning from a meeting with the representatives of a village on the border of the kingdom, who alleged that a group of abyssal fishes were damaging the crops, and Victor was tired. He had hardly slept during the last week trying to figure out what to do for another hundred problems. “I don’t think I can bring myself to do this.”

Chris looked back at him, his expression worried.

“You work far too hard. You should take it easier. Try to look for a pastime, or something to distract yourself.”

Victor had had that. There had been a time when he danced as an escape, something only he and his younger brother knew about. Yuri was twelve years younger, a grumpy teen with no responsibilities and no smiles to spare. When they were younger, he would sing from time to time as Victor danced, in the secrecy of their shared room. Yuri said Victor was good at it and Victor chose to believe him, although he didn’t have much to compare to.

One day, his tutor found him. An old merman, almost as old as the King, who had been in charge of properly raising the two children. He had overreacted, Victor thought. Yakov was a conservative man, who liked to do things as they had always been done, and noble merfolks did not dance, period. Victor didn’t understand why he was so insistent on not trying new things. It hadn’t been traditional food distribution systems that had saved his people from famines and plagues last year. Victor tried to explain. He talked about liberation and anguish and too much to do and a lack of breaks that was crushing him and how dancing was a relief, but Yakov didn’t listen.

Yuri did, but he was too scared.

He refused to sing ever again.

“Victor. This is serious.” Chris threw him out of his thoughts. “Look for something to do. My life is pointless if you’re not at your best.”

A smile spread on Victor’s face.“I’m not sure what to do. It’s not like I’ve done anything but work and study my whole life.”

* * *

Then he began remembering the one time he had swum so high that he had been able to feel something he was not supposed to feel. He couldn’t stop thinking of it. Day and night, the view of the bare light attempting to touch him haunted him, to the point of obsession. There had to be something beyond that, somewhere, that made sense. He wanted to see again, to be able to experience that feeling that he could find nowhere down the kingdom. He needed something new, or his world would drive him crazy.

One day, he escaped. He swam up and up, as fast as he could, and his head hurt and his lungs ached but he kept going. He had to see it. He had to convince himself that it was nothing, just his imagination, that the fear he had felt back then and the desperation he was feeling now had turned the memory into something more fascinating than the truth.

He had to stop from time to time to get used to the lack of pressure, but he kept going relentlessly. And finally he found it. 

It was exactly what he remembered, that _ something _ entering his eyes and filling his everything in a way nothing ever under the sea had done. He lingered on the feeling as long as he could, not daring to go closer but trying to engrave it in his memory before heading back.

It became a habit. Little by little throughout the next year, Victor traveled higher, further every time, in search of that view he was too scared to ask Yakov about.

Victor found out how to swim in order to go as high as possible, as fast as possible, making use of the currents and managing the pressure changes, and he never disappeared for longer than a few hours. The day he reached the top, though, was different.

It had happened progressively. As he dared to go higher, the water had become warmer and clearer. He had discovered completely new species from under the sea. Species that weren’t huge, silent abyssal creatures but an explosion of creatures he had not seen before. Some looked dangerous, and some were. All of them were beautiful, and through the last few months, Victor had often observed them passing by, impressed by the differences between one and another and the vast variety there was, beyond just shape. All due to that thing he felt through his eyes and could not name.

Then one day he broke the Surface.

It was like nothing he had found in the last year of exploration. It was blurry and stiff in a way that made Victor wary, but beyond it, he could feel _ that _in a stronger way than anywhere else and he needed to know. He had become used to not relying on his sonar whenever he was up there, but this time he attempted to use it and found a vast nothingness. It scared him, but increased his curiosity.

He touched it slightly with his claws, and then pushed his whole hand through. Then he finally peeked through it.

Victor was mesmerized. There was the sea, a green vastness disturbed by waves from time to time, and he could feel the waves, not only with his sonar but with his eyes. It expanded until a point where it touched another surface: a blue one, as clear and perfect as could be, only scattered with some white substance that Victor could not identify either, and a yellow ball hanging up, out of his reach, that Victor somehow knew was the source of the feeling that had brought him there. It was also warmer than he had ever felt, and empty. Victor had never thought of the water being an actual substance until he felt the nothingness of this new thing. Suddenly he could not breathe, so he summerged back into the water after only a few seconds.

He spent the whole evening staring at the infinity displayed before him, seeing some figures that floated on the water and watching the blue above him change until he could see nothing but darkness and bright spots above him. He wanted to stay and find why it had changed in the short time he had been there, but it was getting late and he decided to return.

Victor didn’t arrive home until far later than usual and Yakov was boiling with anger, but he was too excited to care. He quietly listened to Yakov's scolding, trying to hide his wide uncontrollable smile, and then complied with the day’s duties. He fought tiredness and excitement and finished everything Yakov asked him to, including a four hour long meeting with some high governors of the provinces.

As soon as he was done, he went in search of Chris. He had been telling him about every new thing he discovered, most of the time lacking the words. Sometimes he would be reduced to using gestures and sounds to try to explain, but he was almost certain that Chris didn’t understand.

It took a week to find the right moment to go up again. It was a difficult week. For the last year, Victor had been happier than ever: he had been as relaxed as he had ever been, and he smiled far more often. He slacked off often too, always disappearing to the above or searching for Chris so he could talk about what he had seen. He was easily found daydreaming, distracted about something that, when asked, he couldn’t quite describe. Yakov found it infuriating; Yuri, worrisome; and Chris, relieving and somehow sexy.

However, since he found out what was beyond the water, he couldn’t focus at all. He spent all his time thinking of what could be out there beyond. Of the light, fluffy looking forms that floated up there, of the enormous figures that he had seen passing by. Of the huge shiny ball that looked beautiful but hurt his eyes when he tried to stare at it. Of the even layer that would change colors throughout the day.

Finally, he managed to make his way back up. He made an extra effort to finish his work in advance, bribed Yuri for help, and asked Yakov for a holiday. The old man, as severe as he was, knew how to be fair, and Victor hadn’t taken an official break since he was seventeen and had fallen ill.

Victor packed some food, warned Chris about his intentions, and left the palace early.

When he arrived, the yellow ball was rising, appearing on the opposite side than it had been before, and Victor didn’t know why but he was amazed by it. He stared all around him, as he had done last time, and he could have spent the whole day there if it weren’t for a hand that clasped his shoulder when he was about to submerge again to breath.

He turned around. He found a boy with a confident smirk, who looked at him with curiosity.

“Hi! It’s the first time I see another merman around here! I’m Jean-Jacques Leroy, call me JJ."

Victor smiled brightly, and then sank underwater. JJ followed him.

“I’m Victor, I live right under. I didn’t know there were mermaids up here.”

“There aren’t. I’m… an immigrant, I guess. I like it here. Are you an abyssal merman? It’s my first time meeting one!”

They stared at each other. Victor had never seen a mermaid with so little scales. His arms were not covered, and neither was his torso. His face was clear too, with just a few marks on the cheeks, right next to his gills, and his hair was short on the top and even shorter on the sides. Victor wondered if it grew. He had never even thought of cutting his. The residual organ all mermaids had in the middle of their face was way bigger than that of any other mermaid he had seen.

“Do you want me to show you around?”

Victor nodded.

JJ swam away, and Victor followed. The boy kept his head out of the water, for way longer than Victor could stand.

“How do you hold your breath for so long?”

JJ laughed.

“I don’t. Use your nose to breathe air instead of your gills.”

“What’s air? And a nose?” 

“Air is what substitutes water above the surface. It has oxygen too. The nose is this thing you have in the middle of the face.”

“And the blue thing above?”

“That’s the sky.”

Victor kept asking, and JJ kept answering. He taught him to breath air, and told him about the sun, about it burning when they stayed under it for too long, and about water. He told him usually mermaids didn’t live in the abyss, they were supposed to be midway between land and sea. That’s why they could breath and see. He told him about the colors as well, and why Victor could see them with the eyes but not with the sonar. JJ kept bragging and Victor was listening as they swam, until they arrived at mainland.

“That’s Japan.”

It was as if the seabed had emerged from the water. Victor watched mesmerized as they approached that huge piece of “land”, as JJ had named it. It was big and colorful and new. He asked JJ about the colors, and JJ pointed and named them. There was a lot of green, many shades of it. Some were darker and some clearer, and JJ named that a “forest”. Next to it, there was something that looked somehow different and discordant, but nevertheless as impressive as everything else. It was white and black, with wide roofs and JJ called it a palace but it looked nothing like Victor’s.

“Humans live there.”

Victor stayed with JJ for three days. He learnt during the first day that his scales and his hair were silver and his eyes blue. He learnt that JJ was brown and red. He explored the coast, and saw humans: they were somehow similar to mermaids, but instead of a tail they had two sort of arms they used to “walk” on earth. Plus they didn’t have claws, and their teeth were rounder. He saw animals who could only move stuck to the floor, just like humans did, and he saw animals that swam in the air. JJ called it “flying”.

When night came, Victor asked more questions and JJ talked about time cycles ruled by the light, and how when the sky became darker, most humans slept. He told him about the bigger light that had appeared, brighter than any other, which JJ called “moon”. He said he followed that same cycle, so he retired to his house, built in a cave under the forest. However, Victor couldn’t sleep, and he left for the coast again. He arrived at a beach and lied on the sand, focusing on trying to breathe and looking at the sky. JJ had told him that he could not let himself dry out but it was enough to keep his scales wet.

By dawn, he heard a loud noise. He moved quickly to hide behind the rocks of the beach, just as two figures appeared on the beach. One of them, the loud one, was one of those animals who walked on four limbs. It looked hairy and not too big. The other one was a human. All the humans Victor had seen were covered with pieces of something similar to seaweed but longer and, once again, colorful. Victor had asked about that, and JJ had called it “clothes”, and said that it looked different depending on the region. Victor watched from his hideout as the human played with the dog. For a while they ran around, pursuing each other. The human would throw a wooden stick and the animal would bring it back. They seemed to be having fun, and Victor wanted to join them more than anything.

It was the first time he ever desired to have legs.

At some point, the human grew tired. He sat on the sand, petting the animal until it got bored and left to poke around. Victor kept watching the human rested for a while, lying on the sand.

The sun was still rising by the time the human stood up again, and began what Victor thought was some sort of dance practice. The movements were slow, some of them steady, some others just attempts, and the whole result was sort of clumsy. Yet it was the first time VIctor had seen another person dancing and it was very slow, and there was no music playing but the human’s movements were expressive to the point where he could imagine the sort of music that ought to be playing.

Victor was so mesmerized looking at the human that he did not realize the animal was right behind him. It jumped on Victor, making loud noises and licking him all over the face. He looked at the massive ball of fluff in front of him, waiting for something, and he decided to imitate what he had seen the human doing before: he reached out for the animal’s head and carefully touched it. The animal didn’t push back. Victor took that as a sign of having done the right thing and carefully continued to pet its head. The animal made that loud noise again and ran away, leaving Victor with the sensation of having done something wrong. 

He was about to leave when the animal reappeared. It was carrying a stick, and released it on the water, floating beside Victor. He looked at the stick and then at the animal, uncomfortable with the whole situation and unsure how to proceed. He grabbed the stick and threw it to the beach, as the human had done before, then turned away.

In no time, the animal returned. It had the stick in its mouth again, and again left it next to Victor. He took it again and looked at the animal. Its tongue was out, and it stared at him with some sort of expectation. Its tail was moving. Victor threw the stick again, this time at the sea, hoping that was what the animal was waiting for.

The animal ran into the water.

“No! Wait!” Victor panicked for a second, unsure of the animal’s ability to breathe underwater, then swam behind the animal. It reached the stick again, and stayed on the water. It moved its paws in a way that Victor had never seen before in order to stay above the surface. He swam back to the beach more calmly.

“Yuuri!” A new voice called, and the human rose his head. Another human had appeared, one with darker skin and thinner body. He was walking towards the one at the beach with a bright smile. “We should go back!”

So his name was Yuuri.

“Makkachin!!” When it heard its name, the animal shouted again. Victor was startled, and sank before they could see him.

Yuuri waited until Makkachin was at his side, staring still at the sea.

“Yuuri, they’re waiting for us.”

He looked back at his friend.

“Wait, Phichit, I… I think I just saw something.”

“Something like what?”

“I’m not sure, something silver and… I don’t think it was a fish. Maybe it was the sun on the sea”, he backed down.

Victor went back to JJ’s cave home and found him awake. They spent the day exploring, looking around at everything there was to be seen, and asking and answering even more questions. That’s how Victor found out that Makkachin was a dog, and what the human was trying to do was dancing, as he had guessed.

By the time the sun began setting, Victor returned to the beach. He spent the night there again, napping and staring at the sky, and Yuuri appeared again that morning with Makkachin.

As soon as Yuuri began his dance practice, Makkachin required his attention. He appeared and straight up licked Victor’s face, leaving it wet with a substance he wasn’t couldn't quite identify . He assumed it was normal and petted the dog, hugging him as he had seen Yuuri do the day before.

They spent the morning playing together. Since Makkachin could swim, Victor brought him to a deeper side and they played together with a stick they had found. Sometimes Victor had to push Makkachin back to the shore, because he tended to go too deep, and sometimes they had to pause for rest, because both of them grew tired, and Victor would use that time to watch Yuuri and the choreography he was creating.

By noon, it clicked. Makkachin was lying down next to Yuuri. He had tried to bring Victor to play with both of them, but had not been able to. Victor was almost sure the human would not take his presence easily. Yuuri turned to Makkachin and announced, “I’m done!”

Victor stared as Yuuri pushed his fringe back and revealed a bright shining smile shining along with big proud eyes a shade of brown Victor had never seen before. He saw Yuuri hum and dance the whole choreography he had put together. It was fascinating, because it had been years since Victor had danced or seen a dance, but also because happiness showed in Yuuri’s face, and Victor felt it deeply.

Before leaving Yuuri turned around, and Victor hid as he looked in his direction for what seemed like a very long time. He went back to JJ’s house. It was time to return home.

* * *

Once again, as he descended back into the abyss, Victor felt crushed by the weight of responsibility. He didn’t know when he would return to the surface, when he would see colors again. And by the time he reached the Palace, he already wanted to go back.

As soon as Yakov saw him, he began an unending angery rant about responsibility and worries and how the kingdom would sink under Victor’s ruling. Victor spaced out for most of the diatribe, just to ask for Yuri as soon as it was over.

“He’s out as well.”

“Oh, where did he go?”

“I don’t know. I have to deal with the two most irresponsible kids in the whole Pacific.”

“And Chris, is he around?”

Yakov sighed. “He’s in his room.”

* * *

He thought that the feeling of missing the surface would pass. New experiences were exciting, but they wore off in time, and it was bound to happen with light as well.

It didn’t.

Victor spent the next four years living in a mental limbo between the surface and the abyss, trying to balance his responsibility with the need to discover, and trying not to lose a grip on reality, _ his _reality, in pursuit of something that would never be more than a fantasy.

At some point, Chris began to go with him. He was not scared, like the first time Victor had been, nor excited. He was just calm and happy as he always was, taking in Victor’s explanations and learning in a more disinterested way. They would spend days on the surface exploring, learning and looking around, sometimes with JJ’s help. Then, when they returned, they talked about everything up there, daydreaming about humanity and everything it meant. Victor would have loved to share it with his little brother, but his behaviour changed almost at the same time. Yuri would disappear as soon as he had a free moment, and run away beyond the city borders. Victor was not exactly worried, but he was really curious about who or what he was meeting.

With every visit to the surface, Victor discovered there was way more to land than forests and palaces. He found that, traveling North, there was ice and no human approached the sea except for those in fishing boats, and traveling South, there was sand and heat and humans who dressed and lived very differently.

But Victor’s favourite spot was still the palace where the very first human he had seen lived. It was right between the beach and a huge forest, with smaller houses all around it. The doors were all at the level of the floor, although it was more than one floor high, which Victor found somehow weird and uncomfortable. He didn’t understand why they used ceilings, since there was no danger for fishes or cold currents to slip in at night. He discovered the reason the first time he saw rain: water falling down from the sky, into the sea and onto the surface. JJ explained that humans found it uncomfortable, since they were not used to living permanently wet and they could get sick when they did. The same way merfolk would if they dried up.

Following the coast southwards, just a few minutes from the palace, Victor discovered a mountain, and it was actually similar to the ones where he lived. Falling down from the mountain into the sea, there was a river. It was wide enough for Victor to think it would be easy to go upstream, so one day, he tried.

It was tiring, and dangerous because humans could easily see him. Besides, the water tasted different and there was something missing from it. Halfway through his first attempt to get to the mountain, Victor got sick. He made his way back to the sea feeling dizzy, trying to hold in his vomit and with a heavy headache. He never tried again, but he loved looking at that mountain.

He fell in love with how the Surface changed with time. Over the course of one year, he felt the changes everywhere: He could feel the cold during some months, and the extreme heat in others. Some days, the sky would be blue and empty and even, but others, it would be covered in grey and white and it would rain. Those days, Victor lay on the rocks, where the waves could not reach him, and that was as near to being a human being he thought he could ever be.

But his favourite part was spending dawns at the beach next to the palace. Whenever it wasn’t raining, Yuuri and Makkachin would go to the beach. Yuuri was easily distracted by the dance practices, and Makkachin often sought Victor out, somehow aware that the cuddles and love of that strange, silvery creature were conditioned by secrecy. Victor came to love playing with Makkachin whenever the human was distracted.

However, there was something even better than playing with him. Victor liked to see Yuuri’s concentrated expression and how little by little he put a dance together, one that at the beginning was clumsy and inexperienced but that he came to master as time passed, the movements becoming as beautiful as they were expressive.

* * *

“Victor! This is done.”

“Huh?”

“We’re done, we managed to solve the issue with the borders, the food this year is growing fine and there are some minor issues to take care of, but Yakov and the delegates are on it.”

Victor looked at Chris in disbelief. It had been a mad period. Problem after problem had appeared and it had been months since his last break. He was dying to escape. He knew that by now, the surface would be turning warmer and he was dying to see the blooming again, the change in the leaf colours and the trees slowly going pink as the sky turned blue more and more often.

“Let’s go.”

Chris nodded.

“How long will you be out?” asked Yakov.

“For how long can we leave?”

“Two weeks” answered the old merman.

“Let it be a month, then!”

* * *

They arrived at the surface the next day, and found something unusual: A huge boat, like nothing Victor had seen before, was waiting near the coast, and people were bringing boxes in. Yuuri was among them, giving instructions as Makkachin stayed quietly by his side. He looked different, though. Thinner. They watched the process for a while, trying to guess what was in the boxes, until Yuuri disappeared.

They followed him to the beach.

“This is stalking, Victor.”

“It’s not. Just because he’s cute… Do you think he’s sick? Last time he wasn’t that thin.”

“I don’t think he’s sick, he has the usual energy. He’s not that cute though.” Chris answered. “He’s rather plain looking… That one, however, that one is rather worthy of attention.”

Victor lazily looked at the person Chris was pointing. It was the human that had been with Yuuri the very first time Victor had travelled to the surface. The man with dark skin, even darker hair and grey eyes. He was wearing different clothes from usual, more colorful, with different fabric, that looked more expensive and shiny. He was smiling wide as he ran through the sand, calling a long “Yuuuuuriiiiii!!”

“That one? That’s Phichit. He’s Yuuri’s friend, but he…”

“Victor. My friend. My confidant. My brother.” Victor tried not to smirk at Chris’ dramatism. “How dare you tell me about all this boring stuff and blabber about humans this and that, and blatantly omit the existence of that creature?”

Victor looked at Phichit. He was indeed attractive in human terms, but he was not quite sure what Chris had seen that Yuuri didn’t have.

“Victor, is there no way to talk to them?”

Victor shook his head.

“JJ told me he tried once to approach humans, but they almost killed him. And he looks like them, way more than we do, so… I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“I think we should follow them.”

“What?”

“They’re going to the harbor. If they are going to get in that huge boat, we should probably follow.”

Chris nodded. As Victor had predicted, after a really long time of preparing, bringing even more equipment, and greeting loads of people, they went aboard.

They spent two days sailing away from the coast, getting deeper and deeper into the sea. Victor and Chris followed along. Yuuri and Phichit spent the whole time talking to different people, constantly switching the company. Yuuri spent most of the time with a woman Victor had never seen before. A short, cute girl with wide eyes and a gentle smile.

The first night, some of them sat on the deck to sing and tell stories as a woman beautifully dressed played music with a long instrument with strings attatched that someone called _ shamisen _. Someone spoke of mermaids, as creatures from the far west who infatuated sailors and no one really knew much about, and the description amused Victor and Chris, who didn’t recognize themselves in the tale.

By the second night, they organized a party. It began as an elegant party, the sort Victor was used to. Yuuri and the girl were the focus of the party, and all the attention was on them. There were congratulatory speeches and everyone greeted them.

“I think it’s his birthday.” Victor said.

“Probably. But it looks like something else. Are those two mating?”

“I don’t think so.”

“Why?”

“I just…” He just hoped it wasn’t so. “I’m not sure.”

Then they brought food, and drinks, and the mood changed. It was lighter, and there was more chatter. Someone was playing music.

“Why are they eating water? Aren’t they supposed to die if they do that?”

“Nah, JJ told me. They can drink just a little. Besides, I don’t think that’s water. It’s something different they drink for fun.”

“Why?”

“I’m not sure. JJ told me, but I have never seen them drinking it.”

Victor and Chris stayed as the party went on, and both Yuuri and Phichit drank that liquid they heard was called “sake”. Yuuri was drinking a lot, more than the people around him, for some reason Victor didn’t quite understand.

Victor watched as he changed. He became more open, dancing in a bolder, more provocative way as Phichit laughed. The people around them didn’t seem to mind, some of them following along, some others simply ignoring them. Phichit looked just as wasted, but he was not acting half as bold.

Makkachin was the first one to throw himself into the water. At some point, Victor had let himself fall back to the sea because holding to the side of the boat just with his claws was tiring, and his movement was too sharp. Makkachin had seen the silvery spark and recognised Victor, so he followed him.

Yuuri leaned over the rail, shouting Makkachin’s name. He tried to reach for him but leaned too far, falling head first into the water. Victor gasped in fear, and he and Makkachin hurried after him as Chris watched them with an amused smile.

Phichit ran to the rail, just to find Victor and Makkachin around Yuuri and Chris bringing a finger to his lips. He nodded and looked around. In the boat, everyone looked just as drunk except for the captain, too busy taking care of the boat.

“I’m bringing him to the shore.”

“Victor, I don’t think…”

“Yes, the boat is travelling back, so they’ll find him there.”

“Heeeey, I’m not asleeep.”

Chris shot a look at Yuuri.

“Whatever, I’m staying. If they panic, it’s your fault.”

“Sure.”

Pulling Yuuri to the shore was a way more complicated job than Victor had thought. It took about half an hour, with Yuuri clinging to him and babbling nonsense. By the time they arrived, the human looked tired.

“Did I overdo it?”

Both of them lay in the water, right where the depth of the water reached Yuuri’s ankles.

Yuuri shook his head.

“You’re beautiful!” He was loud, rolling each word. Victor was not sure how to take it, so he kept quiet. He was silent as Yuuri played with his hair, with clumsy fingers and a wide, awed smiled. He giggled as Yuuri tickled him on his way to touching the scales on his shoulders. “What’s your name?”

“Mine is Victor.”

“Victorrrr” he repeated. “You’re sooo beautiful!”

Yuuri’s hands were on his gills, and Victor was not quite sure what that meant. Mermaids simply didn’t go around touching anyone’s gills.

“I saw you… You were… In the sea with… You’re Makkachin’s friend!”

“Yes, that was… Me” answered Victor. He pushed Yuuri’s hand away from his gills with a gentle gesture. “And you’re just as beautiful.”

Yuuri didn’t hear him, or wasn’t listening. His hands returned to his hair, and Victor let him play with it. 

“Are you a mermaid?”

“Yes. I’m the prince of the merfolk who live in the abyss.”

Yuuri laughed, not taking him seriously.

“How… Is it? To live under there? The Ocean must be nice…”

“It is.”

As Yuuri kept caressing Victor’s hair and skin, he talked about the forms of life in the ocean, how there were less species of fishes and fewer seaweeds. And they were so different from those in the surface. He ranted about the different species of fishes down there, how they differed so much from the fish in the earth, of how hard it was to grow plants and how dark everything was down there.

A shiver interrupted him.

“Are you alright?”

“I’m cold.”

Victor dragged Yuuri through the sand until they were away from the water. The night air wasn’t warm anymore, and Victor didn’t know what to do to make him more comfortable. Yuuri solved it, by throwing his arms around Victor’s chest.

“I don’t think I have body heat as you do.”

“Hmmm, that’s fine.”

Yuuri fell asleep almost immediately.

* * *

When Chris arrived at the beach, he found Victor still hugging Yuuri protectively, his face buried on the merman’s hair. The tide had rose, and the waves reached their waists. Victor looked so calm Chris almost felt bad for waking him up.

“You idiot. You’ll die the dumbest of ways.”

Victor would have given up his kingdom just to stay with Yuuri, watch him as he woke up and spend the morning in the beach with him. Instead, he returned back to the sea, leaving Yuuri behind. They summerged when Yuuri was waking up.

“Let’s return” Chris said. Victor didn’t complain, too busy trying to asses the events of the previous night.

* * *

Yuri and Chris were worried. When he arrived at the palace after spending the night with Yuuri at the beach, Victor had been greeted with the news that his father was about to abdicate in a short time. He had taken the news with a surprising coldness, receiving Yakov’s sentence “there will be no more holidays” with a simple nod. Chris felt proud.

A month into the new situation, and he and Yuri were in front of Victor’s room, about to get in, wondering if Victor was still sane or if the circumstances had shattered him. He had been living mechanically since that day, back to the workaholic prince he had once been, but without his usual passion and cheerfulness. Yakov was the only one who acted like that was fine, out of the desperation that impotence brings.

“Chris, talk to him.”

“What for? I don’t think we will change his mind.”

“I want to at least know what the hell is wrong now.”

“He’s love sick.”

“Disgusting. He’s a king-to-be. He could get any mermaid.”

“It’s a male. And it’s not a mermaid.”

“What?”

“It’s a male.”

“Yeah yeah, I don’t see the problem with that.”

“It’s not a mermaid.”

“Don’t tell me that idiot fell in love with one of those disgusting fishes! Boy, what kind of shitty kink…”

Chris smacked Yuri.

“You’re the idiot here.”

“I’m not sorry.”

They entered the room together. They found Victor still working, going through some visits he had scheduled for a long time ahead.

“Victor” started Chris.

“I’m busy, come later.”

Yuri turned around, but Chris stopped him.

“No, you’re not. Don’t even bother. What the fuck is wrong with you? For real?”

“What am I expected to tell you? You already know.”

“What happened that night? After you brought Yuuri to the shore.”

“He brought me where?”

“Different Yuuri.”

“Cuter than you” Victor added. And it was the first joke they had heard from him in a long time. He sighed and left aside the work.

“Fine” he said. “He was drunk, I brought him to the shore. We just… lay there.”

“It didn’t seem to me that you were just laying.”

“He was clingy, more than usual, and more than with the other humans. He kept telling me I was… Beautiful.”

Yuri rolled his eyes.

“You’ve been told that before. By literally every person with radar in this kingdom.”

“This is different” said Chris.

“Of course it’s different! He could see me! Really see me! He could see what colors I am and he still…”

“Victor, I’m sorry to break this for you, but any person with eyeballs would fall in love with your colors. You _ shine _.”

“You just like him back” snapped Yuri. “That’s the point. So what? I don’t get half what you’re saying but it sounds to me like you fell for another species. Awful idea. Forget him and move on.”

“It’s not only that” added Victor. “ I feel oppressed here. All day long, surrounded by…”

“By water? Sure, Victor. You’re a fucking mermaid.”

“By darkness.” He turned to Chris. “How can you tolerate this?”

“Well, I’m not in love, it’s just a crush on that spectacular ass…”

“He’s not that big a deal.”

Chris shrugged.

“I’m used to it. And you should be, too.”

“I don’t think I can live like this anymore.”

Yuri sighed.

“I might have a solution. Both of you are coming with me.”

“We have to tell Yakov.”

“Since when does anyone in this room care about Yakov’s permission? Victor, for fuck’s sake.”

* * *

It was not usual for an abisal mermaid to have tentacles instead of fins. It was not usual either to seek solitude to the point of living in a cavern and completely alone. Otabek Altin was well known as a legend or a rumor. Some said he was a hermit who hated merfolk. Some others, that he was just too embittered to interact with other people. There were those who suspected he was a magician and those who thought he did not exist.

Yuri knew better. The first time he had heard about him, he had gone ask Yakov. The old merman’s words had been to stay away from him. He had, since then, dedicated all his efforts to find the legend, and he had. He had found a tentacled merboy who lived with his mother in a cave. Not a savage, dirty cave as he sort of expected, but a neatly decorated house in a rock, where both of them lived and dedicated their time to the study of an ability that was inherent to tentacled mermaids: magic. Yuri and Otabek had become friends, but by then, Victor had already began his trips so nobody had noticed Yuri’s. Some time later, Otabek’s mother died and he kept living alone in the cave.

With every visit, Otabek would show him a spectacular trick that left Yuri smiling in awe. They had, over the time, learned to trust each other, forming a friendship that was not really a secret but nobody cared about, a friendship that evolved to something else, something neither of them was sure how to deal with just yet. And when Victor sank, Yuri ran to Otabek, trying to find some sort of comfort about his doubts on how it would affect the kingdom, his family and his own future. Now, he was relying on him to find a solution.

Otabek was already waiting for them in the wide room he and his mother had adapted for magic.

“Beka!”

Victor watched, impressed, as Yuri threw his arms around the other merboy.

“This is my idiot brother.”

Otabek bowed. He wore his hair almost as short as JJ’s and the style was similar.

“Please don’t” said Victor immediately. “I’m here as the idiot brother.”

“How can I help you?”

Victor thought of his options for a moment.

There were none. This was his only chance and his improbable way to happiness.

“I want to become a human. I have fallen in love with the human world, and with a human being and I don’t think I can live away from it anymore.”

“You should erase his memories from that weird place” said Yuri.

“That wouldn’t be bad” added Chris from behind them.

“I was joking.”

“You want me to turn your brother into a human?”

“No… Yes? I guess. I’m not sure. Can you? I don’t want but… I’m sure you can, since you can do all those awesome things you did before.” Yuri had the struggle written all over his face. “I don’t even know what a human is.”

“I can’t.” The answer, blunt and heavy, made Victor’s heart skip a beat. He opened his mouth to protest, but was interrupted by Otabek. “Only another human can.”

The room went silent.

“What?”

“Humans are different from mermaids. They have something we don’t.”

“Legs” Victor said. “Colors, metal, dogs. You choose.”

“I mean something you won’t get to ever reach. A soul.”

“A what now?” Chris asked.

“A soul. That’s the essence of human beings, the part of them that stays eternal even after death. Mermaids live for longer, but after dying, we become seafoam and disappear. However, humans… Humans get to be something else, somewhere else. They call it Heaven.”

“What’s that to do? Can’t I just… get two legs and decent skin?”

“No. Even if you get them, you would still be a mermaid. I don’t think your aspect would be enough. You should still depend on water and eventually you’d die dehydrated. Because we are not meant to survive surrounded by air.”

“So there’s no chance…”

“I didn’t say that.”

Victor was growing impatient.

“To be completely honest, I’m still doubting whether I should tell you about this because it is risky. The only chance does not only put your life on the verge, but also the human’s… Yuuri’s happiness. And of course, that of your beloved ones here.”

“Please tell me. Otabek. I already hate my life enough to not care.”

“Has anyone ever told you how selfish and self-centered you are?” Victor nodded. “And yet you’re willing to risk your family’s happiness, your kingdom’s prosperity, your friend’s reputation and go through a hardly bearable pain just to satisfy a whim.”

“This is more than just a whim. I doubt I can smile ever again if I’m forced to live down here forever.”

“Wait” said Chris. “What do you mean, unbearable pain?”

“I can give Victor a human form. But not for free. I won’t turn you human. As I told you, I have no soul to give you. Your boy, however… Yuuri, he does. You’ll have legs and be able to walk. Despite this, you will still depend on water. But your skin will be human, so you’ll dehydrate eventually.”

“That’s not so…”

“That is not it. You are a mermaid, so you are forcing your fin to stay in a foreign shape. And that will obviously hurt… As if with every step you take you were being stabbed by thousands of knives. That is the unbearable pain part.”

“Beka, what the heck is a human? and are you trying to kill my brother?”

“I am trying to dissuade him.”

“But…”

“That is not all. In human form and without a soul, you will not last long. It varies a lot, but you will probably have three days or so before you get seriously sick, eventually dehydrate completely and die. You will become seafoam, as mermaids do.”

“What’s a seafoam?” Asked Yuri.

“It is this white substance that floats over the ocean.”

“Weird. I wanna see it.”

“I can take you there someday.”

“Have you been there?” Asked Yuri.

“Not yet.”

“What if I fall for a human, just like this idiot here?”

“I will make sure that never happens.”

“Get a room, you two” said Chris. Otabek and Yuri blushed, and Victor shot him a glance.

“How do I get a soul then?”

“Through love. If Yuuri loves you enough, he will lend you part of his soul and you will be a human, with the lifespan of a human and every single human trait. If he does not, you will die.”

“Is there anything else?”

“We have not discussed the subject of payment.”

“Sure, how much?”

“Your voice.”

“Beka, you’re sick.”

Otabek’s expression changed for an instant with Yuri’s words, but he kept going.

“I am not. You can either take it or leave it. It is an awful deal, I would never risk it. You will be throwing yourself to a new world, with a body that will hardly allow you to stand the environmental conditions, and deprived from one of your best assets: Your voice. You will have to make a very specific feeling merge in that boy in just three days. A solid, real feeling, not just some drunk delusion, and get a physical proof of it. A kiss is probably the easiest, but if you get to sleep with him, I guess that would be okay too. I would forget it, that is my honest advice.”

“Beka, that’s…”

“There is nothing else to say. I will not negotiate the conditions, because they are fair. I am exchanging your voice for your happiness, with your informed consent. Come back tomorrow with your decision.”

* * *

Chris and Yuri spent the hours until the meeting with Otabek in Victor’s room, trying to convince him to just forget about it. Yuri fell asleep on Victor’s lap, as he stroke his little brother’s hair and talked to Chris. It was the most serious conversation they had ever had.

Chris insisted on it not being a good idea. On chances and dangers. On the kingdom’s future. Victor did not deny it. He was more involved in his kingdom’s wellbeing than Yuri would ever be. He knew as well that he was gambling with his own life, unable to know beforehand if Yuuri’s words and gestures were real attraction or he was just being clingy.

“Chris, you’ve seen it. The world’s just too beautiful up there. There is too much to see for me to stay here. Knowing there’s a chance, knowing that I could get to see those colors every day of my life, I can’t just… I can’t just rot down here. I can’t close my eyes anymore without seeing darkness instead of the usual nothingness.”

“So it’s not about Yuuri.”

“It’s partly about him. I need to see him again. I need… His smile, his words. I need to see him dancing again, I’ve never felt better than the moment he touched me.”

“I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too. But please, think of this as my way to happiness.”

Chris nodded.

* * *

As soon as Yuri woke up, the three mermen swam back to Otabek’s home. Yuri was holding his brother’s hand, trying to be reassuring, but it was him who needed the strength.

Otabek had already prepared for the spell. A huge, boiling cauldron was sitting in the middle of the room, and some objects had been prepared: a seashell and a bottle.

“Did you make a decision?”

Victor nodded.

“I’m taking the risk,” said Victor. Otabek nodded.

“We will go now. I would say goodbye to Yuri.”

Vitor hugged his sibling, who was looking at the changing colors of the cauldron smoke with an horrified expression.

“Be happy. Bring Otabek with you to Court. I trust you with this, and I’m sorry.”

Yuri hugged back.

“You have no right to do this to me.”

“I know. I hope one day you will forgive me.”

“I hate you.”

Otabek filled the bottle with the content of the cauldron and put it all in a bag, while Victor hugged Chris.

The crown prince followed Otabek to the surface. With the usual excitement replaced by a cold fear stuck in his stomach, the trip seemed longer than usual.

By the time they arrived at the surface, it was night.

“We will do it here, at the shore, so you do not drown before you reach land.”

The ritual was not spectacular or difficult, as Victor had expected. It was only painful. First, he was asked to sing. Otabek held the shell in front of Victor as he hummed the melody Yuri used to sing to him so many years ago. He felt it pulling from his throat, a sensation not as painful as it was unpleasant.

And suddenly, he was not singing anymore.

Otabek gave him the bottle next. The substance in it was thick and smelled sweet.

“Good luck” he said. Victor nodded and drank it.

An intense pain overtook him as if someone were trying to rip his fin apart. Otabek stayed impassible, watching as Victor screamed but no sound came from his throat. Then he passed out.

* * *

Yuuri was not obsessed, despite how effusively Phichit tried to convince him. Going every morning to the beach was something he had always done, way before the spectacular engagement party Phichit had gifted him. Spending his time there looking for a silver flash… Maybe not so much. Yuuri knew it had been a dream. Zoomorphe creatures only existed in tales and religion, and yet… Makkachin had seen it, many times. He just wanted to make sure it was just a fish. A big, silver fish.

So, as every single morning for the past month, Yuuri had woke up at dawn and had run to the beach. But this time, it was not as empty as usual.

Makkachin was the first one to spot it. He ran towards the figure that was lying on the sand. Yuuri went right after him, and found a naked man, his long hair an impossibly silver color.

He woke up when Makkachin licked his face, and hugged him instantly, as if he were an old friend.

Yuuri was worried.

“Oh! Are you alright? What happened? Were you shipwrecked? Are you alone? Is everything fine?”

Victor finally focused his attention on Yuuri, and a smile shone on his face.

“Victor?”

The word bursted out of Yuuri’s mouth before he could stop it, and he was not sure why. It was a word he had heard in a dream, a product of fantasy. And yet...

Victor opened his mouth, but no sound came from him. He nodded effusively and his smile widened.

“Your name is Victor for real? Oh, you’re mute.”

Victor nodded, still smiling, and shrugged.

“Let’s go to my house. Can you walk?” Yuuri took his _ haori _ out and tied it around Victor’s waist. He nodded again, still grinning.

When he got up, he felt as if a thousand knives stabbed his feet. His pained expression worried Yuuri.

“Did you break something?”

Victor shook his head and took a few steps, his eyes stinging as tears pushed to overflow, trying to figure out how walking was done without making it obvious that he had never done that before and trying to hide the pain. Yuuri thought he was hurt somewhere. Slowly, step by step, they returned to Yuuri’s palace.

Around a dozen guests were hosted at the time. There were men and women everywhere, but Yuuri, after explaining the situation to his mother, went straight to a separate chamber, bringing with him a robe, identical to the one the people were wearing in the other part of the building.

Victor did his best to figure it out, but Yuuri had to help him put it on.

“Will you… let me cut your hair?” Victor shook his head. There was no way he was letting anyone cut his hair. No abyss mermaid would do that. Except for Otabek, it seemed.

“No, you’re right. It would be a shame to cut it, it’s beautiful. But let’s braid it at least. Sit down.”

Yuuri disappeared, giving Victor enough time to learn how to sit down, and returned with something Victor had not seen before. He grabbed it and looked at it carefully. It was a brown stick, that resembled a cherry tree branch. One side had small pink flowers hanging from it. It was beautiful. He returned it to Yuuri with a smile.

“Sorry, this is the only thing I could think of. It’s one of my sister’s _ kanzashi _.”

Yuuri kneeled behind Victor and started working. He brushed his hair gently, fingers caressing it as if it were something precious. For a long time, he worked on Victor’s hair. He closed his eyes, enjoying Yuuri’s delicacy on his hair.

Yuuri’s mind was rushing, thought after thought, as he worked on Victor’s hair. Some time ago, he had fallen from the boat. The current had pushed him to the shore. And in the meanwhile, Yuuri had dreamed of a silvery dreamlike creature, beautiful as nothing he had seen before, half-fish half-human, who had told him his name was Victor and had told him stories about the depths of the sea, where the sunlight didn’t reach. Now, a man he had found at the beach was in front of him, same silvery hair, same indescribable beauty. But he had no scales, no gills. His factions were those of a human, not the plain features he had seen in his dream. And, although pale and foreign, the man’s skin in front of him had a healthier color, unlike the paper whiteness of the creature in his dream.

And yet, these strands of hair, the way they reflected the sunlight, were exactly what he had been looking for all this time.

“There, it’s done.”

Victor touched his hair carefully. He was already missing Yuuri’s hands on his hair.

Yuuri had braided part of it, used it to circle the rest and held it all together in a bun that stayed together with the stick.

“It’s women’s hairstyle. My sister, Mari, taught it to me, but… It suits you. You look beautiful.”

Victor shook his head.

“Careful with that! It might fall apart.”

Victor turned to look at Yuuri, unsure about how to convey thankfulness. He opted for holding Yuuri’s hand and leaning his head.

“You’re welcome” said Yuuri with a smile. Victor’s stomach growled. “Are you hungry?”

They returned to the main building, once again walking slowly, and found Yuuri’s mother cooking while his father and his sister brought food to all the other people they had seen wandering around. They sat near her as every single person in the room turned around to look at him. Yuuri watched amused as Victor looked around, bewildered.

“My family runs this _ ryokan _ . We have an _ onsen _ too, so people come from everywhere to treat illnesses and rest for a few days.”

Victor nodded. It was not a palace then. They had nothing similar to an inn down in the abyss. It was just a city.

“Yuuri, do you know who is this? Does he understand Japanese?” His father was frowning at Victor, who smiled cluelessly.

“His name is Victor. His boat sank, I think. He was at the beach. He understands us.”

“He’s a foreigner.”

“Looks like it, yes.”

“Be careful.”

Victor was not sure what was happening. He didn’t know what _ foreigner _meant. He did understand he drew attention, probably because of his hair, or his height. He hadn’t given a single thought to the fact that he could be a bother to Yuuri and, at this point, it was too late to reconsider.

He pointed to the door.

“Do you want to leave?”

He nodded.

“Let’s go for a walk.”

“Yuuri! Remember Yuko’s arriving tonight!”

“I’ll be back by then, Mom.”

Yuuri showed Victor around. He told him about the rental rooms in the building and the different types of baths. Victor was at first more focused on trying to figure out how to walk and deal with the pain than listening to Yuuri, relying on his shoulders as a way to deal with the pain, but as he got used to it, he just grabbed his arm. He kept drawing the attention and some clients, who seemed to be in friendly terms with Yuuri, approached to talk to them. Victor learned from those small conversations some gestures, ways to express without words, and figured out how to convey some others. 

When Victor saw the outdoors bath, he fell in love. He pointed at it, excited, pulling Yuuri’s hand.

Yuuri made him shower first, and change his robe for a smaller towel, and Victor frowned through the process, unsure of the point of all that and just wanting to get in the water already. Yuuri was careful not to destroy his hairstyle as they showered before the bath, but it was pointless. As soon as Victor touched the water, he submerged completely with a content smile. Yuuri entered it right after. Watching Yuuri like that, naked for the first time, made him realize he had lost more weight than he had thought, and Victor frowned momentarily, but he was not sure how to ask.

Once again, they drew the attention of all the other men bathing. Victor felt almost immediately more energized, and suddenly all the pain in his legs diminished. He pointed it to Yuuri.

“That’s weird,” he said. “It usually takes weeks or even months of baths for them to have healing effect.”

Victor tried to splash Yuuri, play around, but once again, that was against the rules.

Lunch time came and both of them returned to the kitchen. Yuuri was expected to help, so he left Victor alone, figuring out the use of chopsticks as he served the tables. He didn’t sit with him until he was done and most of the people had disappeared, and Victor was still eating, figuring out human food and the tools he had been provided. He had noticed no one used their hands to eat, and he was having trouble. Yuuri taught him how to hold them, but practice was a whole different issue.

“Yuuri! Yuuko has arrived.”

As soon as Mari told him, Yuuri stood up and took away their dishes.

“Let’s go!”

Yuuko turned out to be the woman at the boat. Victor immediately liked her. She looked startled by him at first sight, but very soon she included him in the conversation. Victor was smiling happily, as he heard them planning the details for some important event.

They let Yuuko stay in one of the _ ryokan _rooms.

“She’s my fiancée. The wedding date is not even set yet, but…”

That sentence alone made Victor’s stomach sink. His smile faded from his face for an instant.

“Should we go to the beach? Or to the baths?”

Victor pointed to the back of the building, the one that faced the beach.

“Let’s go.”

Yuuko joined them as soon as she had eaten. They walked around the beach. Yuuri told him about the night on the boat, how it had been Phichit Chulannont who had lent them the boat for an engagement party. He was a nobleman who had come to the _ ryokan _ following his father, who was sick and had been told about the curative effects of the thermal waters. His father had improved during his time at the _ ryokan _, but the best part Phichit had taken was Yuuri’s friendship, and ever since then, he appeared as often as he could to stay for a few days. When he had heard about Yuuri and Yuuko’s wedding plans, he had insisted on the boat engagement party. Yuuri felt like it had been more of an excuse to get drunk.

In exchange, Victor drew in the sand. He showed Yuuri a crown, sign of royalty, and the shape of a man with fins instead of legs. Yuuko laughed it off, as if it were a dream or a fantasy, but it made Yuuri serious and pensive for a long while. Victor pinched his cheek to pull him away from his thoughts and Yuuri turned back to a smile, brushing the topic off.

* * *

Yuuri and Yuuko were expected to have dinner alone.

Victor was offered to dinner with the guests of the inn, but he rejected the offer. Humans ate way more than merfolk and he was still full with lunch.

As soon as Yuuri and Yuuko left, Victor walked to the beach and lay on the water, propped on his elbows and letting the waves cover him whole.

Soon after that, Chris appeared next to him.

“What are you doing here?”

Victor nodded and pointed at Chris.

“I came to sightsee, what do you think? I’m babysitting you. I’ve been waiting for you for a long while. Yuri is worried.”

Victor frowned and shook his head.

“I can’t do anything about it. He’s not the only one. How is it going?”

Victor smiled, a wide, dreamy grin.

“I see. So you met him. Did you get to spend time with him?”

He nodded.

“And how does it feel being a human?”

Victor frowned. He pointed his legs with a finger, and mocked a pained expression.

“I see…” Chris pinched his thigh.

“Does it hurt?”

Victor shook his head, splashing water over his legs.

“Oh, so Otabek was right. You’re still a mermaid… Can you turn around?”

Victor turned around, not sure about the intention behind that request… until Chris slapped his butt.

“It’s even better than I thought. I think this is the only part I regret of not being a human,” he said as he groped it. “And yours looks great, although I don’t have too much to compare it with.”

Victor let a silent laugh out.

“Did you see Phichit?”

Victor shook his head.

“Will you?”

He shrugged again.

“It’s weird not hearing you ramble about all of this.”

Victor expression turned sad. Chris splashed water over him.

“Enough. Just be happy. Go in. Walk around. Jump. Slap butts. Do… Whatever humans do when they have free time. If you need me, I’ll be in JJ’s cave. He told me you could get there swimming.”

Victor dressed, because Yuuri had gotten angry at him when he tried to go around naked after the bath, and returned to the _ ryokan _. He had not convinced Victor to wear sandals because the pressure of them only worsened Victor’s pain. He returned to Yuuri’s room, where they had laid two futons, and laid down. The lack of sleep of the day before and the whole whirlwind of emotions had him exhausted, but he still didn’t want to sleep. Yuuri was about to marry, and thinking of that made tears overflow and his stomach knot and his heart ache. And yet, that day he had seen so many things, he had discovered so much it was hard to erase the bright smile from his face.

When Yuuri arrived at his room, it was not too late in the night, but Victor was already there. He had taken out his clothes, probably because of the heat outside, and he was sound asleep. Yuuri took the kanzashi off the wet hair and undid the bun before going to sleep next to him.

* * *

Yuuri woke up when it was still dark outside, just to find that Victor had disappeared. He was supposed to go to the beach and follow his usual routine, not only the dance but also the whole set of exercises in order to stay fit for the wedding. Instead, he dressed as fast as he could and ran through every room in the house, searching for him in panic.

He found his mother attending the ryokan.

“He went to the beach” she said.

Yuuri found Victor on the sand once more. When he saw Yuuri approaching, he smiled and signaled to join him. They both stayed there for as long as they could, the sun warming them and the waves gently touching their feet.

“Do you want to attend this evening’s festival?”

Victor turned to Yuuri, surprised.

“It’s not that big of a deal. Yuuko will be there and so will be the rest of my family and the town.”

He nodded.

“Then, we should find you some clothes to wear.”

Victor wanted to know if he was the one preventing Yuuri from doing what he usually did at the beach, but he was not sure how to do it without giving himself away.

As soon as Yuuri arranged Victor’s hair, they left for the town together with Makkachin. Yuuri was carrying a fabric bag, but didn’t tell Victor the content because it was a surprise. Yuuri insisted on Victor staying, his feet too damaged to go with him, but Victor sticked to him. He was not missing a trip to the inland.

It took them an hour to get to the city, taking a walk and stopping almost at every step so Victor could admire everything there was on sight, be it cattle, crops, buildings or even flowers. Victor had a fixation with flowers. The third time he stopped to admire a violet, Yuuri pulled it out and put it in Victor’s hair. He smiled and touched it with the tip of his fingers, careful. His smile was contagious, and it was hard for Yuuri not to grin along. The man before him seemed to have an unbeatable energy, giving his best to try to hide the pain he was in, only noticeable with an occasional flinch when he stepped on a stone or mindlessly kicked something on the path. And Yuuri found that deeply endearing, and somehow scary, because he had arrived just yesterday, yet Yuuri felt like he could die for that smile.

He stepped back with a blush.

When they arrived at the town, the flowers formed a multicolored crown on Victor’s hair, and he took his shoes off as soon as they stepped on the even streets. Everyone looked at him as they walked, some peeking from their homes, some more openly. It was only the children who took the courage to approach him, reaching for him.

“Are you a _ yokai _?”

Victor frowned at the little girl who had asked, confused, and looked at Yuuri for help.

“A _ yokai _ is… a creature from fairytales.”

Victor shook his head.

“He’s not” answered Yuuri. “He’s just a person.”

“Can I touch your hair?”

Victor nodded and lifted the girl. She buried her hands in Victor’s bun, revolving it. Yuuri laughed, and pulled the kanzashi, letting Victor’s hair fall free. Another kid pulled it, and the girl in Victor’s arms screamed:

“It’s going to get dirty!”

Two children picked it up, giving it to Yuuri, who was having a hard time trying not to laugh at the whole situation.

“If anyone wants to touch his hair, queue up.”

They did. In no time, there was a queue of about ten children behind Yuuri, waiting for their turn to touch Victor’s hair. He sat down on the floor and let them, one by one. It took a lot of patience from Yuuri, and the parents didn’t seem too happy about it. However, Victor’s smile was convincing, and Yuuri’s presence, reassuring. Soon, some of them took their turn behind the children.

The sun was high in the sky when they finally arrived at the tailor’s.

“Morning, Yuuri!”

“Good morning, Minako. We want to make a sort of emergency order.”

“Sure! Tell me.”

“We need a kimono for tonight.”

The woman stopped to look at Victor as he entered the shop.

“For him?”

Yuuri nodded.

“Is it possible?”

“No. Unless you want one of the ones I already have and that would be expensive, because I’m supposed to submit them to the clients.”

“And adapting one?”

“That should be easier, but Yuuri, who’s that? He looks damn good.”

Victor waved at Minako, who smiled in awe.

“He’s a friend I made. His name is Victor. Victor, this is Minako.”

Yuuri took the bag and gave it to the tailor.

“It’s my sister’s… Is it too hard?”

“Leave it to me!”

Victor let Minako do as she put the furisode on him.

“It fits, actually. Maybe we should just cut the sleeves…”

Victor shook his head.

“Are you sure? This is meant to signal women’s status.”

Victor nodded. Minako went back to work. She adjusted the kimono around Victor. It was slightly short, but it worked.

“But are you sure this is meant for your sister? It’s too big for even an average man.”

“Mom says the client wanted to marry her, one of those weird exhibitions of wealth. And the pattern is so beautiful… We thought we’d never get to use it.”

“We just need to find a proper obi, but Victor should be able to use it. Is it for tonight? He’s going to outshine your fiancée even at your own wedding.”

Yuuri blushed and shook his hands.

“There’s no way he could do that!”

* * *

They returned to the _ ryokan _ just in time to have lunch, dress up and leave back again to town.

Along with Yuuko, Mari and Yuuri’s parents, they walked around the main street, full with food and game stands. Victor looked around, astonished, at the display. People around him were dressed with party clothes, in every color Victor could imagine and even some he had not seen yet. The food brought him all kind of smells as he pulled Yuuri with him, trying to taste all of them. He still caught the attention of people, and permanently Yuuri felt the stares on him. It took no time for them to lose the others among the crowd. By the time Yuuri noticed, he was too busy watching Victor be fascinated by the taste of _ dango _ to care.

By dusk, something else caught Victor’s attention. A group of musicians had begun playing music, and several people were dancing. Victor pointed at them.

“Do you want to join?”

Victor nodded.

“Sure, go ahead.”

Victor pointed at Yuuri.

“No way! You catch enough attention by yourself.”

Victor pouted, but Yuuri shook his head.

“I’m not drunk enough for this.”

The comment provoked a silent laugh from Victor, who just ran to join the dance.

Not only did Victor had the potential to outshine Yuuko, but everyone else as well.

Yuuri watched, entranced, how Victor danced with the music. It seemed as if the red silk of the kimono, decorated with an intricate patron of chrysanthemum, was made explicitly to highlight the paleness of his skin. The obi, an aquamarine tone Yuuri had insisted on, matched Victor’s eyes, a unique color he had never seen before. He had taken care of Victor’s hair again, and it was pinned on a bun decorated with flowers, part of it cascading over his shoulders, too long and too beautiful for a full upsweep, moving along with every movement he made. He was barefoot, having won that fight even before leaving the house, and his eyes were closed most of the time. He was following the music, but it was not the same dancing everyone around him were doing. His movements were different.

As Yuuri stared, he felt that the dance was directed at him. His heart was pounding faster as he watched Victor’s dance. It reminded him of the silver gleaming over the sea, of that night, drunk at the beach, of a voice talking about life under the sea, of sleeping at the beach, hugging a body that was unfamiliar and yet felt warm and comfortable.

But there was also something about the present. About the gleam in Victor’s eyes. About the half-tied obi, hanging behind Victor, the red silk sliding over his shoulder. The relentless movement of his feet, his body tender yet sensual with the music, an expressiveness Yuuri had never seen before. Melancholy and sensuality together, in an armony that didn’t let him look away.

And yet, something was off. Tears began falling on Victor’s face, and his expression became pained.

Victor was suffering. Throughout the day, he had learned, little by little, to ignore the constant pain on his feet as he walked, tricking Yuuri into thinking that he was healed, that the onsen water somehow magically made the pain disappear. Dancing was different. It was stronger steps on the ground, no breaks between them. It was changing on the go movements that were meant for fins. It was memories of his younger brother, his life under the sea, his kingdom and every place he wouldn’t be at ever again. It was the only way he had to deliver his feelings to Yuuri. To keep his attention, to make him realize Victor was worthy of his love, of a piece of his very soul, even if he was a stranger. But over everything else, it was pain. A strong, physical pain on his feet, more intense, more inevitable than it had been until that moment.

Just a few steps into the dance, Victor’s eyes were burning with the effort to keep the tears inside, to keep smiling for Yuuri, and for the sake of the mission he had to accomplish. At some point, he couldn’t hold it. A tear fell, and after that, he couldn’t stop the rest. He kept his eyes closed, oblivious of the circle that was formed around him to watch him dance, spinning around until the music came to an end and everything went quiet, everyone still looking at him. No one, not even Yuuri, willing to break the spell he seemed to have created around him.

He opened his eyes and searched for Yuuri. He was looking at him from a corner, his expression unreadable for Victor. He smiled wide and walked towards him, slowly, every step an unbearable effort. He wanted to ask how was it, if Yuuri liked it, if he wanted to dance with him, but no sound would leave his throat.

“That was beautiful” muttered Yuuri. “One of the most beautiful things I have ever seen.”

Victor gulped and bowed in gratitude. He approached the first free spot he saw to sit down.

“Are you tired? Do you want to go home?”

It was late, and Victor was exhausted. And yet…

He pointed at Yuuri.

“I’m fine” he said. “We can return next year.”

Victor nodded. Yuuri grabbed the neck of his kimono and covered the exposed shoulder with a light blush.

Victor grabbed Yuuri’s hand as soon as they disappeared from the festival’s view. The night air was warm, and it was a nice walk. Yuuri was silent all the way home, his fingers tight and warm around Victor’s.

Back in their room, they both undressed, and Yuuri took care of Victor’s clothes. He looked like he wanted to say something, but Victor didn’t know how to push it. Yuuri undid Victor’s upsweep, braiding it for the night, and as he was about to lay on his futon, Victor grabbed his arm. He opened his mouth, but once again, no sound came from it. He wanted to lean in, to kiss Yuuri, to bet everything on one attempt, but he let go of his hand instead. He laid down awkwardly, Makkachin between them. He hugged the dog and tears of pain and defeat began silently falling on its fur. Yuuri didn’t seem to realize.

Yuuri woke up to find Victor still asleep next to him. It was a nice view, hugging Makkachin, his eyes closed, silver hair a mess around him. His skin looked different, somehow dry, and yet he was beautiful. He shook his shoulder kindly. Victor opened his eyes.

“Let’s make a day trip to the mountains today.”

Victor nodded.

As soon as they prepared their lunch, they left. They walked all morning, slow pace, taking breaks by Yuuri’s insistence as soon as Victor showed the slightest sign of pain. All the way up, Yuuri talked to Victor. He told him about the meaning behind the ropes tied around some trees and the small shrine on the sideway, and all sorts of stories about myth creatures and magic. But none of them were about men with fins.

It was way past noon when they reached the place: a waterfall, hid in the forest.

Victor was awed. He had lived all of his life surrounded by water, used to it, and he was almost sure he could not be impressed by it. But there it was, surrounded by trees, each a different shade of green, water falling over the rocks, a thunderous sound that Victor still found somehow calming. And underneath, a natural pond, surprisingly still and clear, where Victor could see fishes he had never seen before and some insects glowing with the sunlight in all shades of blue and green. Once again, the world of the surface had managed to fascinate him.

He turned to Yuuri, bowed slightly, a wide smile on his face.

“I’m happy that you like this place” he said. Victor nodded. He loved it. Just like everything else Yuuri had shown him, and just like everything he had discovered in the human world.

They had their lunch next to the waterfall, both a little tired. It took no time for Victor to jump into the clear water of the pond, pulling Yuuri with him shortly after. Yuuri noticed how, almost immediately after touching the water, Victor’s skin looked like it magically recovered, and made a comment about it. Victor just shrugged. He was reluctant to get out of water, and even more reluctant to return. He was running out of time.

They arrived at the _ ryokan _ at dusk, but instead of going home, they sat at the beach, next to each other, both tired and happy, their hands still intertwined from the walk. Victor was uneasy. Three days went away fast, he knew, but these had been too fast. He hadn’t stood a chance, and now he had no more than two hours left. Looking at Yuuri, everything seemed surreal: the landscape, his legs, Yuuri’s presence… And his death.

He had no way to request, no voice to express himself. It was hard to know what Victor was for Yuuri when he couldn’t even ask, but Yuuri was smiling and relaxed, off guard next to Victor, and Victor was choiceless. It was not like there was anything to lose.

Yuuri’s smile was erased from his face when Victor lifted a hand to touch his cheek, turning it slowly to look at him. He saw the tears once again about to fall from Victor’s face, and didn’t move as Victor closed the distance and their lips touched. He stood still as Victor kissed him, his mind blank, his heart racing, Victor’s lips soft and chapped against his.

Victor pulled back and looked at Yuuri. He was a mess at that moment, skin dry, tears falling endlessly, and the saddest smile Yuuri had ever seen on his face. He reached for Victor’s bangs, pulling them aside, in an attempt to look him in the eyes.

Victor shook him off and walked away until he lost sight of Yuuri, aware that it had not worked. He undressed and walked into the water, unsure what to do next. Was he supposed to die immediately? Did he still have time? Was he supposed to run to Yuuri, beg him for a kiss?

* * *

As Victor and Yuuri began their way up to the waterfall, Yuri was swimming down to the depths of the sea. Not to the kingdom, but to the periphery, where the tentacled merboy lived.

As soon as he arrived, he shouted a loud “I’m here!” before looking in every room for Otabek. He found him at the backyard, taking care of the algae there. Yuri pulled him into a short kiss before he began a rushed, unintelligible speech.

“He’s… Chris told me that I don’t… You should… The kingdom… Please, help me.”

Yuri hugged him, face buried in his chest. Despite the long time he had met Yuri for, and the not so long time they had been sort of dating, he had never seen him that way. Not when he arrived, shy, both of them kids, asking if he was a monster or a ghost or an actual mermaid, and not when he had requested to touch his tentacles, out of sheer curiosity. He had not been that desperate even at the times when he appeared all angry, venting about how Yakov was pressuring him so much he couldn’t stand him or when his brother began disappearing. Not even when he asked for Otabek’s help with his brother’s issue.

Otabek’s love for Yuri had grown slow and steady, as everything in his life was. Even if Yuri was the complete opposite from that. It was not an unconditional love, since Otabek had put in place one rule: He would not let it interfere with the negotiations. That’s why he had offered the deal in the first place, despite it being absolute madness: Victor was his client, not his brother-in-law. And yet…

Yuri was begging.

Otabek hugged back. He breathed deeply and muttered an _ I’m sorry, mom _ before pushing Yuri back.

“It is time for us to pay a visit to the surface.”

* * *

By the time they arrived, Yuri was so impressed he almost forgot about Victor. Otabek was trying his best to answer Yuri’s eyes in a cool way, repressing his need to marvel at Yuri’s beauty under the sun. They could leave that for later. First things first, they had to save his brother. They found Victor already in the water, talking to Chris.

“How did it go?” He was asking.

Victor shook his head.

“And what now?” Asked Yuri.

“Now he will deteriorate and eventually die,” said Otabek. “I don’t think he’ll survive for the next dusk.”

“There has to be a way! I thought… You said…”

“There’s only one,” Otabek said. “I’ll give Victor’s voice back. As a loan of sorts.”

“What about the payment?”

“There’s none this time. If this turns out properly, I’ll be compensated.”

He took the shell that contained Victor’s voice and slammed it against the rocks. The shell broke, and Victor felt how his voice returned to him.

“This makes no sense.” He said. “You could have given it to me before.”

“Magic is an exchange, I don’t make the rules. Sorry.”

“Why did you return it now?”

“Because I’m going to take something else from you.”

Victor hadn’t realized he still was wearing the kanzashi until Otabek took it, letting Victor’s hair free, and gave it to him.

“I need your hair.”

Victor nodded. Otabek took a knife from his bag and cut Victor’s hair with a short, clear cut.

“I’ll be back by dawn. Yuri, please help me.”

The two disappeared under the sea. That left Chris and Victor alone once again.

“You don’t look so bad with short hair. It makes you older.”

“Is that a compliment?”

Victor looked at the wooden flowers of the stick in his hand.

“I’m sorry that I couldn’t introduce you to Phichit.”

“Don’t be.”

* * *

Victor woke up with Yuri violently shaking his shoulder. The sun was rising, and Otabek was waiting for them on the water. He was holding a knife.

“This is your chance.” He said. “You have to stab Yuuri, right on his heart, before the Sun goes down.”

“I can’t do that.”

“He won’t die.”

“Then what’s the price?”

Otabek threw a look at Yuri and felt silent. 

“What’s the price, Altin?” Victor insisted.

“Since he’s not willing to give you your soul voluntarily, you have to take it away from him. And along with his soul, you will be taking his happiness.”

“I can’t do that.” He shoved the knife back to Otabek.

“I told you you shouldn’t have told him.” Said Yuri.

“If I don’t, the contract becomes invalid.”

Yuri took the knife and put it again on Victor’s hands, pushing them closed around it.

“You’re gonna stay with him today right? Just keep the fucking knife.”

Victor returned to the _ ryokan _ with the knife hidden under his robe. He found Yuuri already awake, helping his parents clean guests’ rooms.

“Yuuri!” He was startled when he heard his name coming from an unknown voice. He turned around to find Victor.

“Who...?”

“It was me.”

“How can you talk now?”

“It’s a long story and I need to talk to you.”

Yuuri nodded at Victor’s serious face.

“Let me finish this first.”

Yuuri’s tasks took up the whole morning. It wasn’t until way after noon when Yuuri finally could escape with Victor, back to the beach.

“You cut your hair” said Yuuri. “Why? It was so beautiful.”

“I had to if I wanted to talk to you like this.”

Yuuri sank his hand on Victor’s hair, still an impossible silver.

“Can you tell me where did you come from?”

“Yes,” said Victor. “But I’m not sure if you’ll believe me.”

Yuuri took Victor’s hand and squeezed it.

“Try.”

“I’m a merman. I come from the depths of the sea, where the light doesn’t reach. I found the surface, the colors and you and fell in love. A seawitch, my brother’s boyfriend, turned me into a human and I’m supposed to receive a proof of true love from a human in order to fully become human and live in the surface… I think that’s it.”

“So it was real! I… I thought I was dreaming and Phichit too, but Makkachin was acting weird and… It was you that night, when I was drunk.”

“Yes, that was me. That was me all along, way before that. I have been around the beach for… A long time, I guess.”

Yuuri felt the pressure as a sudden, hard, clenching feeling on his chest. The lack of time, Victor’s feelings and his life, were too much and for a moment, it outweighed him.

“And yesterday’s kiss didn’t work.”

“No. It was me who kissed you, so maybe that’s why…”

“So I have to kiss you? And then your life will be saved.”

“You have to love me,” muttered Victor. “The kiss is secondary.”

Yuuri lowered his head, his eyes fixed on the sand.

“I like you. I feel attracted to you in a way I have never felt before. I enjoy the time spent with you, and you’re probably the most beautiful creature I will ever see. But I don’t know if that’s love just yet.”

He saw a drop falling on the water, and rose his head to look at him.

He hugged Victor, and the merman felt Yuuri’s calm warmth, the steadiness of his heartbeat against his own, his fingers clutched around the fabric of his robe, a silent request not to go.

“Let’s try, Victor.” The sudden security in his voice surprised Victor, a determined glow in his eyes. Victor nodded.

He let Yuuri’s hand slide to the back of his head, pushing him gently forward. He felt the warm, wet tears that fell on his neck, all efforts to stop them completely useless. Yuuri’s shoulder shaking, crying just like he was. He felt the warmth of spring around them, the tingling sensation of his skin drying, the wind hitting them, merciless. He felt the waves on his knees, the seaweed tangling around his ankles. He heard Yuuri’s unsteady breath and a soft sob. He heard the sound of the waves spreading over the sand and the distant voices of some other people. He saw the green of the trees, the pink of the flowers. The grey, white and blue of the sky. Yuuri’s shiny brown eyes and pale skin. He saw the ocean, now blue and green because it changed with the sky. And he felt Yuuri’s love, which had began to appear a little too late, and a little too soon, but it was real, just as the love he felt for Yuuri and for the colors of the surface. And he knew it was all useless as Yuuri leaned forward and pressed his lips against Victor’s and he tasted of the distinctive salty flavor of the ocean, of Victor’s home, and they lengthened the kiss, their time together, as much as they could, even as Victor fell, his legs turning into fins, his nose smaller, his skin glittery with scales, and he smiled, and caressed Yuuri’s cheek carefully not to scratch him with his claws, as he felt tears falling from his own eyes, and he muttered “it was all worth it” before disappearing into the water, already a part of the waves.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi!! Sora here! This is the first bang I ever participated on, and the third (second, if you only count the successful ones) adaptation of a fairytale I write. But it is the first one set at a different period/place than the original fairy tale. I’ve tried my best, but it’s probably far from perfect, since I’m neither Japanese nor historian. I hope you enjoyed the story nevertheless since I did wrting it. If you did, please leave kudos and/or tell me on a comment and make me happy.
> 
> The art in this bang is by Bectara, whose art you can find on https://www.deviantart.com/bectara and https://bectara.tumblr.com  
And it was beta-read by AoiHerondale (https://aoi-herondale.tumblr.com/) and Hecate_Mist (


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